As I sat down this morning to do some future journaling and stream of consciousness journaling, I realized my fear of failure is still there.
It still lingers in the background.
And I wondered, does it every really go away?
I think that as a society that is so obsessed with approval and social proof, it’s hard not to worry about what we say and do. To not worry about being good enough by society standards. By our OWN standards.
We worry that what we’ve chosen to do won’t work, and that we will be forced to hang our heads and admit we couldn’t do it.
But admit it to who?
Saying we failed means also admitting we were less than adequate, and in the entrepreneurial world, it means we couldn’t make the money and pay the bills.
Everything, our sense of being, gets challenged.
And I guess sometimes it’s easier to stay in fear and not take action than it is to actually fail.
But then of course, it means we don’t do anything. We don’t take action and we sure as hell don’t move forward.
Instead, what if we confronted the fear? I’m pretty sure it never really goes away. It’s a human reaction.
Trying to tell yourself that it will be okay and that everything will work out is bullshit.
Cause sometimes it just doesn’t work out.
But I think being okay with that is the first step to overcoming the fear of failure.
Let’s look at some actual steps to take when fear of failure comes up.
Step 1: Don’t wrap your existence up into your endeavor. First things first, you are not your business. Or whatever it is you’re doing. Even if it fails, it does not mean you are a failure. This is something I tell my kids all the time. Just because you do something naughty does not make you a bad person. It just means that THAT ONE THING was a bad decision.
Step 2: Look at all the outcomes. We worry about failing, but what else could happen? What if everything went extremely well? It’s important to remind ourselves that all possible outcomes are equally possible.
Step 3: Be positive. I believe we create our existence. It’s the law of attraction. If we think something bad will happen, more than likely it will. If we stay positive and think good will happen, well there’s a much higher chance things will go in that direction. Switch out of negative thoughts and soon as possible.
Step 4: Think of what’s next. If you do fail, what could you do next? Having a loose plan in your mind can help you realize that failing may not be the end of the world after all.
I know it’s hard as hell. It’s hard to say, “oh it’s okay if this doesn’t work out because I can do something else.” Especially when we invest a lot of time into something. But if we don’t wrap up our worth into it and stay positive, we have a much better chance of overcoming the fear of failing.
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